Life's little stories...

Princess Chaos (I like that name) has asked me to write about my life story. Not a topic I would have chosen myself.

I'm already having visons of people stumbling upon my blog by pure accident and after some minutes of excrutiating pain resulting from reading my tender account of my 5th birthday when my mother (bless her) baked me a cake that looked like a house and nobody arrived at my party; or when I kissed a girl for the first time and she dumped me the next day. I'm certain this will have them diving for the corner of the room to do one or both of two things: ripping the electrical cable from the wallsocket and hanging themselves with it. A bit melodramatic but you get the point.

Ok, I'll think about it.

But the whole kissing thing has got me wondering. Here's another universal rhetorical thought: How times can one get away with kissing a 'platonic' female friend before you run out of shall we say... 'free kiss vouchers'? You know, like food stamps or something.

Thoughts please.

My objective for this week...

Monday       Tuesday        Wednesday       Thursday          Friday

Mercifully (unlike this little fella), I will be fully clothed. As I write this I can see my colleagues slumping back in their seats in relief with little beads of sweat running down their faces.

Anonymous vs Annie: What the...?

Keep your guard up, no hitting below the belt, and obey my commands at all time.

Adumski vs Annie: Redirect, your Honour?

For the record, I have no intention of writing about how and when my underware rides up - much less how it makes me or anyone else feel. The world can do without THAT bit of needless information.

Lets pretend for a moment that I hibernated through the first part of this century. Can you tell me what pop-n-lock is?

Debate is encouraged. Arguing is encouraged. Harrassment is not.

Abba. Toto. Whatever. My musical tastes, although eclectic in nature, do not include the likes of Swedish pop from the 70s. I'd opt for several hours of root canal instead. Somebody once said that sarcasm, sinicism et al is a cheap defense mechanism. I say: WHO CARES?

As for healthy narcisism? Some might argue that's a contradiction in terms - a paradox. I'll admit, this blog business can be mildly entertaining - dare I say inspiring? Time will only tell.

I'll note that you're sticking with honest and vulgar. Brave decision.

Not stoned? You should try it. It may help with the insomnia. Failing that, read my blog.

I arrived late at work today wondering just how many more times it will take for me to stop mixing late nights and alcohol (expensive food and wine to be precise), and expect to get away with it the next day. Kind of a universal problem for people I guess. (Sorry Annie, bit more rhetoric, but at least its not in the form of a question...)

Having a close friend who is a chef and owns a restaurant is a recipe (no pun intended... okay maybe a little one) for disaster especially on school nights.

Now I realise this is not the most interesting thought. I can almost hear the thud as you crash to the floor after lapsing into a mild coma from boredom. Sadly, its the way I feel right now and its about as good as its going to get today. *groan*

A friend has asked me why I've not yet posted an proper blog content. Well, I have now.

Okay, okay kind of a stupid response, so as soon as I can think of something insightful or interesting to say or comment on, I'll be sure to jump on the cyber-exhibitionism bandwagon. Yeehaa.

Until then, as one fellow blogger very correctly pointed out: I'll have to stick to rhetoric.

Why is it so effortless to offer other people good advice about their lives, but so incredibly difficult to apply those same insights in your own?